five on friday

1. Every day has its own triumphs.... some small and some big. Today's was removing my Christmas rug from the front door. It's not that I haven't noticed it there for the last 216 days (yes, I took time to figure out how many days it's been since Christmas), but I've just been too lazy or either too busy to care! So, I thought about just leaving it out since Christmas is only 147 days away, but I needed an accomplishment today, so I drug the old thing upstairs into the attic! YAY, me! :)

2. Project of the Week (POW)- I attended a baby shower on Sunday for one of my favorite church members who is a soon-to-be-grandmother. I just love her and her entire group of friends. I made a onsie for a shower a few weeks ago, and I loved it so much that I made it again for Mrs. Mary's new grandson. I know that she will be a super grandmother!

In addition, she gave her son and daugher-in-law the sweetest gift. I took a picture of it with my phone so that you could see it. I thought it was the cutest idea.

The card says: "There are many days that will be special in Bennett's life. Birthdays, graduations, and the day he takes is bride. This knife will be part of those memories to come. It will cut many cakes and be part of lots of fun. So store it, protect it, and use it each time. And pass it on as a treasure of the Monaghan's family line.

So cute, Mrs. Mary!!!!!

3. I was injured yesterday shooting my video for Jason. A stupid wasp stung me right in the neck while I was getting geared up to jump on the trampoline. That's right, Jason... I put myself in harm's way just for you! The things we do for love... But Jason reassured me that it was worth it. Referring to the video, he said, "I'm really excited about having this, because when you die, I can go back and watch it and see you." Really? REALLY???

4. And speaking of love, our anniversary was yesterday. A DECADE! I'm married to the greatest man and father in the world (right behind my daddy!) We had a great date last night with dinner at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse . And you won't believe what he got me... a new sewing machine. A BERNINA! (That's a brand of sewing machines for all you non-sewers!) Now if I just had something to sew...

5. I have a new accountability partner. She's not a new friend, but this is something we have talked about FOREVER! We've been at it for 4 days now, and I am so thankful for Christian friends that help me strive to be more Christ-like and keep me focused on the things that are most important. If you don't already read your Bible daily or if it's become a rut for you, I encourage you to find someone to share it with. God encourages us to keep each other in check! Don't believe me? Jason's best friend just preached a sermon on this, and if you still need convincing, check it out:

NorthStar Church- Troy Comer- ACCOUNTABILITY

I'm thankful that Jason and I have both been blessed with people that encourage us and keep us focused on Christ!

our tenth anniversary

Jason...

A decade. Sounds like a long time, but time flies when you're having fun. I'm still amazed at how God continues to bless our marraige, and I've overwhelmed that I can actually love you more tomorrow that I do today, yet I find it happening over and over! You really are EVERYTHING to me. I didn't know when I was 14 what a significant and amazing choice I was making. You have changed me for the better, and I hope to be forever yours.

I sought to buy you a gift that would tell you how much I loved you. The traditional gifts suggested something made of aluminum or tin. And though those metals are tough much like our marriage, I just couldn't go that route. The creative side of me had to "make" something. But what? Armed with a handycam, a tripod, and a simple movie program, I set out to create a movie that might somehow show you what you've meant to me over the years! It's not much, but it's EVERYTHING I need to say to you on our tenth anniversary! I love you with EVERYTHING inside of me. Happy Anniversary! May there be 50 more!

Yours Always,

Sarah

NOTE: You can watch it on YouTube by clicking "Our tenth Anniversary Video" below, or view in the box on this blog!

Our tenth Anniversary Video.

Be sure to turn your volume up!

Our Tenth Anniversary from Sarah Marlin on Vimeo.

perceptions

As we drove into the parking lot of the "girly" restaurant, I prayed that this meal would be somewhat eventful and enjoyable. As we opened the door to enter, I prayed one last time, but I was certain the hair on the backs of the necks of those already dining stood straight up as my two boys stormed in.

We did as we always do: We told Jack to sit down at the first available seat, Jason chose the first thing on the menu because he had no other choice, and then he rushed to lasso Max into a chair before he could destroy something that would cost us! I stood in line, and for a moment, pretended to be one of those more civilized women that were dining near us.

Of course, that was just a dream. Shortly after I ordered and had everyone's drink in hand, I approached the loudest table in the restaurant... the one where MY boys sat! :) It was a rather calm dinner... for the first five seconds... and then Max spilled his drink. So I gathered 3,000 napkins, got down on my knees, and cleaned the floor. Shortly after that, Max had to tee-tee, so Jason took him to the bathroom. Then our food came. The boys ate... QUICKLY... and then they were ready to go. So as always I swallowed most of my lunch whole in an effort to get out of there before they lost ALL control and we really made a scene.

And just when I was almost finished, SHE walked in. You know her. You don't know her name, but you've seen her out in public. The door seemed to radiate with gold when she walked in with her sweet little boy and girl. They were dressed to the nines... I was sure the little girl's underwear were probably monogrammed since every other part of her outfit was. She showed them to their table, where they sat ALONE while she ordered. She looked over at them a few times while she was ordering, and she gave them the "look." You know... like I'll kill you if you don't sit up straight, smile, and act perfect, and they responded just as expected. It's the same look I give my children, and then they laugh and carry own with exactly whatever they were doing!

After she ordered, she returned to the table. The little boy happened to be wearing the same shirt as Jack, and he tried to make conversation about it with us, but she quickly asked him to turn around and leave us alone, because we "were eating." We were secretly longing for the little boy to continue to his conversation just so that he could entertain Jack and keep him out of trouble.

Just a few seconds later, she was spotted by one of her long-lost friends that it seemed she had not seen in quite a while. They chatted briefly, and then their food arrived, and it was time to say the blessing! She introduced the upcoming prayer to her "friend," gave the children a pep-talk about doing their best, and then it began. They sang the most beautiful prayer together. I'm sure it was in three-part harmony. I forced my mouth closed as they said, "Amen." They ate the remainder of their meal, using perfect etiquette and manners.

It wasn't long before we were rushing out the door with two little boys that had long overstayed their welcome. As we exited, it was like watching two criminals escape from jail. Shear joy overcame their faces as they were out of their seats and free to be as loud as they wanted!

But on the ride home, I couldn't help but think about the mother that was beside me. At one point, Jason jokingly said, "Why don't our kids sit there as nicely as those kids?" and for a moment I wondered the same thing. She seemed to have it all together. Her children were perfect... or at least it seemed. A part of me was jealous of what I had seen...I renamed her MOTHER PERFECTION because she genuinely seemed to have it ALL together! But then I looked in the back seat at my two boys and smiled.

I thought to myself: I wonder what people think of us when we are out? Do they see a terrible mess, do they see a mother who longs for perfection yet finds herself a few strands short every day, or do they graciously smile and say a prayer for us as we pass? All three are appropriate reactions! But as I thought back to the mother in the restaurant, I had to wonder if she was as perfect as she seemed. She couldn't be... none of us are, right? I'm sure her children misbehave occasionally, surely they've thrown at least one fit, and I feel like they might have even been outright defiant at some point in time.

With all of that said, my encounter with MOTHER PERFECTION convicted me about my blog and the perception I might leave, so I wanted you to know my motives behind it.

First, I write this for an audience of three: Jason, Jack and Max. As I researched blogging, I was fascinated with the possibility of leaving a legacy for my children to look back on. And as I attempt to find something to write about, I am drawn to our happiest times! It's not that I don't want my children to know we STRUGGLED and FUMBLED our way through parenthood many times along the way, but by writing about the good times, I want them to know that that is what we focused on... and that our focus on good things brought us through the bad things!

But to the other three people that might read this, please don't be deceived! We did not fall out of Pottery Barn. In fact, one of my biggest goals in life is to have "good" bread and milk in the house, and I cannot seem to do it. This week, I was guilty of serving my child a hotdog bun with butter and jelly on it, in lieu of toast, and............... I'm ashamed to write this, but I added water to half-and-half to pour over their cereal, in lieu of milk! You all just gasped, didn't you?

So with that said, next time, you read my blog, I hope that you might find something helpful or inspiring, but please don't be fooled by all that you read. We are just like every other family. Our life is not a show, and we are not waiting for the applause of the world every time we perform. We are who we are, and trust me... it's a long way from MOTHER PERFECTION!

spice it up

You already know how much I despise cooking, and because of that, we eat out almost every night. But... the "higher-up" (a.k.a Jason) says lunch is not an option. We have to scrounge around for something every day. As the summer draws to a close, our options are becoming slim.

As I bravely entered the almost bare pantry today, I found a few edible items that we could throw together to get us through until supper.... a box of Rice-a-Roni and a can of green beans. I was also fortunate to find a small frozen pizza in the freezer. Now these things don't SOUND appealing, and they might not actually BE appealing, but that doesn't mean they can't LOOK appealing!

So I did the only thing I could do.... I PLAYED WITH OUR FOOD! I took those lovely ingredients, along with a few fresh cherry tomatoes from the backyard, and before I knew it, the masterpiece was created!

The fabulous thing about kids is that they don't always catch on to our underlying schemes, and because of this, we are often successful at creating smiling faces with very little effort!

Of course, everyone has a different reaction to my ploys.

The first plate you see belongs to a little boy who is a "pleaser." He enjoys cleaning his plate in an effort to make me happy. He will rarely leave anything, and if he does, you know he absolutely did not like it.

The second plate belongs to a little boy that will inevitably ask for a "snack" as he gets up to leave the table. He doesn't actually eat meals like normal people. He merely takes a bite of something new every 10 minutes from the time he gets up until the time he goes to bed!

I almost think my boys might tell you they miss the hot, consistent meal that is provided to them from school and daycare each day during the school year. And fortunately for them, they will soon return to those meals. But in the meantime, we have use what we have and do our very best to "spice it up!"

five on friday

So I've decided to call this five on friday, and if you hate it, you might not wanna come back next Friday because it'll be showing its face once again... new material of course! :) Just to introduce it... I'm just gonna tell you five random things. I have no idea what they will be, but I'll attempt to write at least one out of five that you actually find interesting (those are pretty good odds, huh)! Anyways, without further ado, here are today's five on Friday:

1. The countdown is on. School starts in exactly 13 days. I desperately need to go to my classroom at school and get things halfway together. If you don't know, I teach Kindergarten, and I when I say "I love my job," I seriously mean it! It allows me to do everything I enjoy: play with kids, do crafts, take pictures, and hang out with a fabulous assistant! Speaking of my assistant, she was such a blessing in the middle of last year when she was hired, and I am soooo excited about spending an entire year with her this year! She rocks! I found out this week that she plays the ukelele... kind of made me a little bit jealous! Wonder if I could play the ukelele?Yea right!!! (picture below is of her and one of my sweet little girls from last year... praying for a whole new batch of sweet children to love on!)

2. An update on our behavior plan~ It is going fabulous! Jack earned 42 marbles and lost 8. I know Jack is most proud of the 42 marbles that he earned, but I'm pretty thankful for the 8 in the sad jar. Those eight little marbles kept me from spanking him, losing my patience, or ruining our day even one time! So tomorrow we will pay him $4.20... $0.42 goes to Jesus, and the other $3.78 goes straight to him for whatever he chooses. Hey... it may not seem like much to you, but when you work for something, it becomes a whole lot more valuable! Way to go Jack!

3. All of my close friends need to sit down for this one.... (drum roll please) I cooked supper twice this week, made homemade pizza with Jack for lunch one day, and cooked the best poundcake EVER! If you don't know me that well, let me explain: I HATE TO COOK! Yes, we eat out every night... most restaurants in Tupelo know us by name! LOL- I'm not very good at it, and I try to steer clear of anything I stink at, and I see no reason to go to the grocery store, slave over the stove, cook a meal, barely eat it, and then clean up, when I can walk into a restaurant, eat, enjoy, and leave! It's my story and I'm sticking to it!

4. Project of the Week: I HEART RIBBONS, but not when they look like this:

They just get all tangled up, and it's a big old mess. So, I came up with a plan to fix this:

Here's my remedy. I took two toilet paper holders, enhanced them with paint, drilled holes in the ends of them, and ran a dowel rod through them. It was cheap, easy, and best of all, no more messy ribbons!

5. I took Jack to the dentist on Wednesday. He loves it, due mainly to the fact that he gets lots of prizes. He got a great report, and I got the wild idea to make Max an appointment since he had not been checked out before. Low and behold, they had an available appointment the very next day! So we (reluctantly) went. God bless Mrs. Amy (the hygienist) for dealing with that disaster in such a loving manner! If you live in Tupelo and are looking for a good dentist, you should try mine:

http://www.tupelosmiles.com/

Hopefully, I'll still be allowed to go back after my two-year-old's performance today! :)

Part II: ADOPTION (a·doption n.): growing a baby in your heart instead of your belly.

Thank you to everyone who read my post yesterday! I am so proud of Jack, and I appreciate you allowing me to share his story with you! Today I want to tell you about Max. I was initially going to write a story for Max similar to Jack's but then I had a "ah-ha" moment! I already had a story like that!

Let me give you a little background. When we found out about Max, we were very cautious. In fact, only a few, very close friends knew that his adoption was even a possibility. We have been through several failed adoption possibilities along the way, and we didn't want to get our hopes or anyone else's. So... we just kept it very quiet... which is awfully hard!

The letter you are about to read is something that I wrote just a few days after Max was born to send out to family and friends. I wanted to fill them in on our new addition and the details that we had kept quiet for so long! Thanks again for reading and allowing me to share!

Dear Friends:

I just wanted to take a moment and say hello to you all! I’m sure this took most of you by surprise, but our family has been patiently waiting for this day for quite some time. If you have a moment, I’d love to tell you the story of how this all came to be! Prepare yourself…it’s quite a long story!

When Jason and I realized in 2003 our chances of ever having a baby were slim, we began talking to people whom we knew had adopted. A couple in my parents’ Sunday school class had recently adopted a newborn, and we inquired about the process, and got a number for a lawyer in another state. We were sold and quickly signed on. Unfortunately, the luck that they had would not happen for us. The lawyer returned our money within a few months, due to a lack of babies. She assured us she would keep us next on her list, and she would call if anything ever came about! Anxious to have a family, we quickly put that behind us and moved on to Option #2.

Another couple from my hometown church had recently adopted two children from Ukraine. It took me a while to get on board this ship, but we signed on with a lady from Atlanta, Georgia within a few months, and she had all of our paperwork started by January of 2005. Most of you know the story of Jack, but we left for Kiev, Ukraine, in November of 2005, and returned home 46 “very long days” later, with the child I knew God had set aside for us all along. Jack was 2 ½ and he was everything we had prayed for.

Well, as Jack is getting older, now 4 ½, we really wanted to add on to our family. Unfortunately, it’s not as easy as it seems. I, like most women, have dreamed of having a newborn baby, but domestic adoptions are just so hard to come by. Because we already knew the ropes of Ukraine, even though I swore I’d never go back to that place, we contacted the lady who helped us get Jack, and we started the process all over again around April of this year. I now know it was a God thing, but during the beginning stages of the process, Jason was not totally sold on the idea. He had some reservations about going back, the money it would cost, and many other things. I knew in my heart that I wasn’t as on board as I thought, and by August, we told our facilitator that we had changed our mind. It was probably the best thing we ever did, though we had no idea at that time!

One night in the middle of September, I got home a little late and I swung by the house to get Jason for dinner. When he got in the car, he simply handed me a letter and calmly said, “This came in the mail today.” What I read took me completely by surprise. It was a letter from the lawyer that we had not talked to in over 3 years. It said that a birthmother had recently come into their office and was looking for an adoptive family. The lawyer said that she did not know where this letter would find our family, but if we were interested, to please call her back. The letter had been sent to our address in Myrtle where we used to live, and had been postmarked nearly 2 weeks earlier. It took that long to reach us in Tupelo. We haven’t received any forwarded mail in quite some time. I told Jason that I was sure they noticed it was from a lawyer and they probably thought we were being sued or something!!! Of course, I called her a million times the next day and finally got her 2 minutes before bus dismissal. I figured they had already found a family, but it was worth a try.

When she answered, she reassured me by saying she was so glad I called back, and that they had not found a family. She asked me to create a book about our family and send it for the birthmother to view. I made the book as fast as I could, and I had it in the mail by the last week of September. The lawyer did let me know that the birthmother would view two books and that she would let me know something as soon as the birthmother had made a decision. It was so hard to decide what to put in the book, as I wanted it to be perfect. The last thing I told Jason about it was that she may not pick us because we had Jack. I figured she would pick a family that did not have any children!

I did not hear back from her until October 15^th, when she e-mailed only to let me know that the birthmother was taking her time and we had not been eliminated. I would not hear from her again for quite some time.

By the time Thanksgiving rolled around, I had taken it completely off of my mind. I had decided that it would not be a reality, and we would just move on from there. The Monday we came back from Thanksgiving, Jason called that afternoon and told me to call and listen to the messages at the house. I did, and there was a message from the lawyer saying she had good news and to call her back. At this point, I could think of only one thing that sounded like good news to me.

When I returned her call, she said that we had been chosen. You have to know that I have countless stories of failed adoptions that we have been through. We have very scarred hearts, and we are very cautious because of it. I was elated, but in the back of my mind, I knew things could change in a moment. She asked us to set up a time to meet the birthmother. We planned to meet on Wednesday, December 5^th.

Jason and I took off work and headed out-of-state. This was her birthday. I can’t imagine why she wanted to meet on this day, but it was her choice. It was probably the scariest meeting I’ve ever been a part of.

She was nothing like I imagined. She was 24, had a wonderful personality and we all just “clicked.” Her dad met with us, and it was so neat to see all of the similarities between our families. She just wasn’t ready to be a mother, and she knew this was what she had to do. She went on to tell us that she chose us because we had another little boy. If you remember, I figured that would be what would keep her from choosing us! Isn’t God great? She wanted her baby to grow up in a big family with siblings, cousins, and lots of people!

When we left, she gave each of us a hug, and she told the lawyer the next day that she had had the best birthday ever. She said that she never imagined finding someone that was everything she wanted, but we were it.

Now it was just a matter of waiting. Her due date was January 16^th, but at a doctor’s appointment on January 3^rd, she had already dilated 3 cm. We figured the baby would be earlier, so we began packing and preparing. If you can imagine, it’s hard to prepare for something like this when you are guarding you heart for fear it won’t work out. On Monday, January 7^th, the lawyer called and said that she was at the hospital. The teachers who were in planning with me will recall my quick exit and that I did not return! Unfortunately it was a false alarm, and we did not end of going that day. She went to the doctor last Friday, January, 11^th, but the doctor was she was not far enough along for him to induce her at that point. He said he would induce her Thursday, the 17^th, if she had not delivered by her due date on the 16^th. We had made our minds up that we would leave Wednesday night after church and make it to see him born.

As you might now know, she went into labor on Monday afternoon around 3:00. I had almost gotten home when I got the call, and I’ve never gotten a vehicle loaded so fast in all of my life. We were on the road for maybe an hour when the lawyer called to say that he had been born.

The next six hours seemed like an eternity, but we reached the hospital at midnight. When we got on her floor, the nurses said that the baby was in her room. Talk about a knot in your stomach. We went into to see her, as well as met her mother and sister, and she quickly handed me the baby… one of those moments I won’t ever forget. After visiting a moment, the lawyer asked if we could take him to the room where we would stay and she said sure. She commented by saying, “He doesn’t feel like he’s mine. He’s supposed to be your baby!” I felt an overwhelming sense of relief as we headed to our room. The rest is basically history. We spent some time with the mother the next morning, because a friend visited and wanted to see the baby. She signed her rights away later that morning. She did not say goodbye, as I can only imagine how much strength she must have had to do this! I’ve thought about her a hundred times since then, and the only thing I can come up with is that God is sovereign. He knows all, and everything is in His ultimate plan. He knew we wanted a baby and that she wasn’t ready for one. He granted her the strength and peace to go through with this, and us the patience, to wait for a moment such as this!

Anyways, I just wanted you all to know that we are a very excited family of four, and we cannot wait to be home! I want to show him to the world, and hopefully we will be back in a few days. We have few legal technicalities that have to be take care of and then we will be headed home! Thank you for your prayers and concern, and I can’t wait for all of you to see Baby Max!!!

Love, Sarah

And the rest is history-in-the-making! Max is now two and a half... and he fits every description of a typical two-year-old! He may not look exactly like us, but he is just perfect for our family! I wouldn't trade anything for those infant days! I would have loved to hold Jack as a brand new baby!

We are still able to send updates to Max's birthmother along with a letter if we choose, and I treasure this opportunity! It's the least I can do for someone who entrusted me with their baby! And no... she doesn't know who we are, but yes... we know who she is! And we will forever pray for her and remember the sacrifice that she made for that sweet little 7 lb 11 oz baby that she gave life to!

If I could put my gratitude for Max into a song, it would be found in Mark Schultz's song "Everything to Me." Check it out and, also, check out the new photos of my sweet Max at the bottom!

The Link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPYaRJOWznk

ADOPTION (a·doption n.): growing a baby in your heart instead of your belly.

I'm a talker by nature, and I can have a conversation with almost anyone at anytime. But there is one particular subject that I love to talk about more than any other. It's one of those things that most people "want" to know, but they'd never ask! They're afraid of what you'll say if they ask, so they just wonder. I'm talking about adoption, of course.

Jason and I have an on-going joke about my openness when it comes to the adoption of our boys. We are asked frequently about Max and where he got that blonde hair. Instead of brushing it off, I usually just say, "Oh, both of our boys are adopted. The first one could pass for our biological child, but this second one doesn't have a prayer with that blonde hair and green eyes." Most people are immediately intrigued, and once I open that door, they are full of questions about the process.

I'm sure a few of my Facebook friends have scanned by my profile and saw that both of our boys are adopted, and though some of you know our story, many of you don't. So today, I decided to share the story of my boys... well, one of them at least! I'll save the other for tomorrow. I hope this gives you a small glimpse into our hearts, our struggles, our overwhelming desire to have children, and the amazing way that God has blessed us through this process!

THE STORY OF JACK

It's only fitting that the Hebrew meaning of the Jack is "God is gracious!" Oh how true that is!!! I can't write this story without telling you about life before Jack. We desperately wanted kids. We had researched and been to doctors, but our efforts failed every time. Though they never found an exact reason why we couldn't have children, we knew we had two options. The first was in-vitro fertilization. Trust me: I know there are millions of people that have families because of this process. We researched this process, but for us, we found many instances where this process conflicted with our beliefs and we did not feel comfortable pursuing it. (And I'm not judging those of you who did in-vitro... just telling you why we chose a different path!) Our only other option was adoption, which if I'm completely honest with you, was a hard pill to swallow!

I had a bazillion reservations about this: What if the mother came back and stole her baby? What if the courts took the baby back because of legal issues? What if the child didn't want to be with us? What if we didn't want to be with the child? What if we couldn't love this child because it didn't come from us? What if, what if, what if??????? I had them all covered!

But Jason never wavered. He was always on board! One day he had been talking to a fellow pastor that had two adopted children, and they were talking about my reservations with the process. The pastor reassured Jason by saying, "She'll come around. Her desire to "birth" a baby just has to be overcome by her desire to "be a mother." And he was soooo right! One day I just knew that was God's plan for us. All my questions were resolved and my fears were calmed, and we jumped in and started the process.

We initially signed on with a lawyer who was instrumental in the adoption of a family we knew, but that did not work out (you'll hear more about that tomorrow), and after a few months, we were off to something else. We finally signed on with a consultant out of the Atlanta area, and the madness began. We started in January, and after what seemed like an endless process, we found out in July that we had permission to go to Ukraine in November. You might be wondering why we chose Ukraine... domestic seemed impossible, Russia required multiple trips, and you had to be 30 to adopt from China... so Ukraine was our best option at the time! So on November 5th, we said goodbye to our jobs, our families, and everything that was familiar to us, and headed into something that was so unfamiliar and overwhelming and we could have never prepared ourselves for it!

We were in Ukraine for several weeks before we got an actual referral for a child. It was not until November 21st that there was a healthy child coming off the database for adoption. At this point, we wanted more than one child, and we were in luck, because there were two brothers available... one 5 and one 2. We left Kiev, Ukraine, by bus two days later and arrived in Jack's region the same day. We quickly found out that the 5-year-old brother had been adopted just a few days earlier, but the little one was still available... Jack!

We visited him everyday for the next 26 days! I have to say that our first meeting was not what I had expected. I thought this child would immediately fall in love with us and us with him, but it wasn't like that at all! He stared blankly at us and never cracked a smile. It was awkward to say the least, but by the second or third day, he was smiling and laughing, giving us kisses, and saying momma and daddy! After going to court, waiting the required time period, and jumping through a few more hoops, we were allowed to take him from the orphanage on December 20th.

Our journey in Ukraine ended on December 22nd, 2005, but it is forever etched in my mind. 46 longs days for one of the greatest blessing life has to offer! He name fits him well... "God is gracious!" That He is! Who are we that we deserved the most precious responsibility of raising this little boy? God has been so gracious to allow us the privilege of helping mold Jack...even though we fail miserably at it some days!

As I write this, Jack is seven-years-old. Parts of that story seem like they happened a hundred years ago, but the other parts seem like the were yesterday. Either way... he'll always be our first! I love that we get to share all our "firsts" as parents with him. Those of you that have more than one child, know that there's something about the first one! You make all your mistakes on them, but they still love you!

I posted a few pics below of Jack in the orphange:

First Row: 1.This is Jack's group that he lived with. 2. This is the first day we ever saw him. 3. This the orphanage where he lived.

Second Row: 1. The first time we ever heard him laugh. 2. This is when he finally started kissing us. 3. He had never had a sucker before. He was pretty happy about it!

Third Row: 1. These shoes he wore on several occasions. I think it's safe to say they are too small. 2. Jack being silly during one of our visits. 3. The beds where they all slept at night.

I put in a few new pictures too:

Stay tuned tomorrow for the story of Max!

I THINK I'M LOSING MY MARBLES!

I was super excited to wake up and start fresh today. I woke up as Jason was getting ready to leave, and quickly began reading my Bible before two little wild boys were up and going. As I read, I was reminded once again of the sovereignty of God. Today's scripture dealt with Jesus washing the disciples feet, which is exactly what we studied in children's worship yesterday. The focus was on dealing with difficult situations and our reactions to those. It stated that Jesus could have thrown "in" the towel, but instead, he chose to put "on the towel. I decided to put "on" my towel and make today better than yesterday!

The boys were up soon enough, and we got dressed and were out the door. Our adventure started at Hobby Lobby where we picked up the following items: 2 jars, 2 wooden plates, and 50 marbles. Let me just say that any project that requires me to go to Hobby Lobby has to be good!

Once we were home, we waited until Max's naptime, and then we got started on our project. We laid out everything we needed to complete it. Jack picked out the colors he wanted and he painted the wooden plates that we attached to the front of our jars.

When he was finished, we laid them out to dry and started on another step to our project. We made a list together of three things:

1. Chores- these are things that Jack is required to do. He must do them on his own or when asked without whining.
2. :)- these are things that make us happy. They are not always required, but they make our hearts smile when we see them.
3. :(- these are things that make us sad. When we see these things, there are usually consequences in our house.

Finally, I was ready to explain the marble system to Jack. We have 50 possible marbles that he can earn throughout the week. He gets marble by completing chores and doing "happy" things. If we see a "sad" behavior, we take a marble from his "happy" jar and move it to the "sad jar," where it remains until the end of the week. At the end of the week, we count the marbles in the "happy" jar and he earns $0.10 for each marble (if you're not a math major, that means he can possibly get $5.00 per week.) After we pay him, we are going to show him how to take 10% of that money as his tithe and we will take it to church on Sunday. The rest is his to save or spend as he chooses. I truly believe that tithing is best learned with small amounts rather than large!

After we had our lesson on how it would work, we cleaned the kitchen together, where Jack earned 2 marbles for helping and showing good manners. Unfortunately, he lost one soon after for talking to me in a not so nice voice. But we are learning, and I'm determined to make this work.

The important thing is we have a system that shows Jack his successes, as well as his not so successful moments. He has complete ownership in this system, and I'm looking for brighter days to come! It is my prayer that Jason and I become intentional about leading Jack to become all that God intends for him to be!

THE LAST STRAW (well... not really!)

Okay.. let me be honest! It's not really the last straw, but I am serious about trying something new! Though I don't remember my own childhood very well, I am certain that Jack is an exact replica of me! He is soooo hard-headed! I do believe that I outgrew my behavior issues as I got older, but Jack seems to be going in the opposite direction. So, I'm making a plan. Tomorrow we start something different for rewards and punishment... something that allows me to be more patient, and something that allows him to see his successes and not-so-successful moments! I'll keep you posted! We start fresh tomorrow! I'm so grateful that God allows parents second chances... and third chances... and fourth chances... etc!!!! And I'm grateful that though I screw up often, God still blessed us with that sweet little boy over 4 years ago! He is one of the greatest highlights in my life! I love you, Jack!

CHOO CHOO

MY FIRST ENTRY

It's funny that after all this work, I really don't even have anything relevant to write about! Blogs are much trickier than I imagined... so if you see errors on mine, just know that a very inexperienced person was behind it all! :)