ADOPTION (a·doption n.): growing a baby in your heart instead of your belly.

I'm a talker by nature, and I can have a conversation with almost anyone at anytime. But there is one particular subject that I love to talk about more than any other. It's one of those things that most people "want" to know, but they'd never ask! They're afraid of what you'll say if they ask, so they just wonder. I'm talking about adoption, of course.

Jason and I have an on-going joke about my openness when it comes to the adoption of our boys. We are asked frequently about Max and where he got that blonde hair. Instead of brushing it off, I usually just say, "Oh, both of our boys are adopted. The first one could pass for our biological child, but this second one doesn't have a prayer with that blonde hair and green eyes." Most people are immediately intrigued, and once I open that door, they are full of questions about the process.

I'm sure a few of my Facebook friends have scanned by my profile and saw that both of our boys are adopted, and though some of you know our story, many of you don't. So today, I decided to share the story of my boys... well, one of them at least! I'll save the other for tomorrow. I hope this gives you a small glimpse into our hearts, our struggles, our overwhelming desire to have children, and the amazing way that God has blessed us through this process!

THE STORY OF JACK

It's only fitting that the Hebrew meaning of the Jack is "God is gracious!" Oh how true that is!!! I can't write this story without telling you about life before Jack. We desperately wanted kids. We had researched and been to doctors, but our efforts failed every time. Though they never found an exact reason why we couldn't have children, we knew we had two options. The first was in-vitro fertilization. Trust me: I know there are millions of people that have families because of this process. We researched this process, but for us, we found many instances where this process conflicted with our beliefs and we did not feel comfortable pursuing it. (And I'm not judging those of you who did in-vitro... just telling you why we chose a different path!) Our only other option was adoption, which if I'm completely honest with you, was a hard pill to swallow!

I had a bazillion reservations about this: What if the mother came back and stole her baby? What if the courts took the baby back because of legal issues? What if the child didn't want to be with us? What if we didn't want to be with the child? What if we couldn't love this child because it didn't come from us? What if, what if, what if??????? I had them all covered!

But Jason never wavered. He was always on board! One day he had been talking to a fellow pastor that had two adopted children, and they were talking about my reservations with the process. The pastor reassured Jason by saying, "She'll come around. Her desire to "birth" a baby just has to be overcome by her desire to "be a mother." And he was soooo right! One day I just knew that was God's plan for us. All my questions were resolved and my fears were calmed, and we jumped in and started the process.

We initially signed on with a lawyer who was instrumental in the adoption of a family we knew, but that did not work out (you'll hear more about that tomorrow), and after a few months, we were off to something else. We finally signed on with a consultant out of the Atlanta area, and the madness began. We started in January, and after what seemed like an endless process, we found out in July that we had permission to go to Ukraine in November. You might be wondering why we chose Ukraine... domestic seemed impossible, Russia required multiple trips, and you had to be 30 to adopt from China... so Ukraine was our best option at the time! So on November 5th, we said goodbye to our jobs, our families, and everything that was familiar to us, and headed into something that was so unfamiliar and overwhelming and we could have never prepared ourselves for it!

We were in Ukraine for several weeks before we got an actual referral for a child. It was not until November 21st that there was a healthy child coming off the database for adoption. At this point, we wanted more than one child, and we were in luck, because there were two brothers available... one 5 and one 2. We left Kiev, Ukraine, by bus two days later and arrived in Jack's region the same day. We quickly found out that the 5-year-old brother had been adopted just a few days earlier, but the little one was still available... Jack!

We visited him everyday for the next 26 days! I have to say that our first meeting was not what I had expected. I thought this child would immediately fall in love with us and us with him, but it wasn't like that at all! He stared blankly at us and never cracked a smile. It was awkward to say the least, but by the second or third day, he was smiling and laughing, giving us kisses, and saying momma and daddy! After going to court, waiting the required time period, and jumping through a few more hoops, we were allowed to take him from the orphanage on December 20th.

Our journey in Ukraine ended on December 22nd, 2005, but it is forever etched in my mind. 46 longs days for one of the greatest blessing life has to offer! He name fits him well... "God is gracious!" That He is! Who are we that we deserved the most precious responsibility of raising this little boy? God has been so gracious to allow us the privilege of helping mold Jack...even though we fail miserably at it some days!

As I write this, Jack is seven-years-old. Parts of that story seem like they happened a hundred years ago, but the other parts seem like the were yesterday. Either way... he'll always be our first! I love that we get to share all our "firsts" as parents with him. Those of you that have more than one child, know that there's something about the first one! You make all your mistakes on them, but they still love you!

I posted a few pics below of Jack in the orphange:

First Row: 1.This is Jack's group that he lived with. 2. This is the first day we ever saw him. 3. This the orphanage where he lived.

Second Row: 1. The first time we ever heard him laugh. 2. This is when he finally started kissing us. 3. He had never had a sucker before. He was pretty happy about it!

Third Row: 1. These shoes he wore on several occasions. I think it's safe to say they are too small. 2. Jack being silly during one of our visits. 3. The beds where they all slept at night.

I put in a few new pictures too:

Stay tuned tomorrow for the story of Max!