the tooth fairy -q&a-

My child seriously has an addiction... pulling teeth. He is missing four front teeth in a matter of three weeks.... three of those within the last week! Because of this, I now consider myself to be somewhat of an expert at the whole "tooth fairy" thing. For those who haven't had much practice, I thought I might do a little q&a to help you steer clear of a few possible mishaps that might arise!

how do you decide who is going to be the "tooth fairy?"

We're all adults here so there's no use pretending! Although it would be great if this fairy actually existed, the truth is somebody has to take on this imaginary role. At our house, the choice was simple... Jason pulls out the teeth, and I get to be the fairy. Jason has the stomach to use pliers or whatever is necessary to remove a tooth, and I'm much better at sneaking in the room and making the magic switch! And if that weren't a good enough reason, there is a little something about pretending to be a magic fairy that makes me feel important, so I wouldn't dare give him that honor! But for you men who are afraid of the stigma that might go along with being called a "fairy," have no fear... just remember The Rock. He made a lovely tooth fairy, and there's nothing prissy about him!

what's the current value of a tooth?

This question has no correct answer. Let me caution you about making this decision. Please know that you will be very excited when they lose that first tooth. You'll be so excited that you'll start seeing $ signs in your head and you'll be tempted to give away large amounts of money. Just know that the first tooth sets the standard for those that follow. If you give a $20 bill, be prepared to give that 19 more times before their tooth losing days are over! That's a lot of money! Our going rate is $5, but even that feels a little steep at times!

do you have any tips on being prepared to carry out your duties?

At the first sign of a semi-loose tooth, please go directly to the bank. If you're like us, you may not keep cash around your house. In my experience, most teeth have been lost late in the evening. To avoid any late night trips to the ATM, you need to prepare in advance.

what if you are not prepared to carry out your duties?

Okay... I gotta be honest! After 6 lost teeth, I'm still unprepared. I NEVER have cash. There are a few options when this happens. First, you can dig around frantically in your house and pray that money magically appears. If you get no results, you either have to go to the ATM or you can be creative. You can always write out an IOU. I had a student tell me the other day that he got candy from the tooth fairy. If you think your child accepts checks, you could always write one of those. I'm ashamed to tell you what we do but here goes: we take money from Jack's wallet. Of course we replace it, but because he actually has no idea how much money he has, it's a simple solution to a possibly catastrophic situation. Don't judge me.

how do you choose the appropriate time to make the switch?

Well this is a no-brainer... when the child is asleep! DUH! But that's easier said than done. When you put the child to bed, be sure to tell the child that if they don't go right to sleep that the tooth fairy will not come. This usually does the trick, but there are exceptions to every rule. Last week, I crept into Jack's room at 10:35 PM and was about to make the switch when his eyes flew open as he simultaneously said, "Whatcha doin'?" I seriously couldn't keep my eyes open another minute, so I went to sleep planning to get up early and carry out my plan. Unfortunately, I was awakened early that morning by Jack who said, "Look Mama... my tooth is still under my pillow. I guess I went to sleep too late and she did not come." The good news is you can always put that tooth back under the pillow the next evening and try again!

do you have any other advice to offer when it comes to losing teeth?

If I could offer any other advice, I'd encourage you to take lots of pictures. There's nothing like that first set of teeth and they'll only be there for a few years so capture as many shots of them as you can. And those little snaggle tooth pictures are priceless, and their existence is even shorter lived. Of course, next comes those awkward shots where the new teeth begin to arrive, but you'll be proud you have those memories as well! Here's look at our journey the last few week:

I'm hoping that my tooth fairy days come to a halt for the next few weeks. If not, I'll be forced to buy baby food and pudding! I hope your adventures are as joyful as mine have been! These little milestones are what make the big picture of being a parent so worth it!